Private Coaching for parents facing drug addiction & recovery in the family.
I can’t change anyone’s behavior, but I can influence that behavior by my actions.
People will think it's your fault, but it isn't!
You might be labeled a “bad parent, but you're not!
You'll want to isolate and continue to try and figure it out on your own, but you can't, anymore than your loved one can do it on their own.
So much is to be gained from reaching out and asking for help!
Al-anon groups are based on the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, and on the idea that others cannot change the behavior of the person with an addiction; only the person with the addiction can change. This is inaccurate.
We understand that if you're looking to “force” another person to change, it can’t be done (at least not for long).
There are researched ways to increase the odds that an individual will begin to change and enter treatment and STAY in treatment. Following this process may take longer but will save you both emotional and financial capital and it will be longer lasting.
We offer The B.A.L.M. which is a professionally facilitated, year long, simple, modern and evidence-based, online recovery education and continuing support programdesigned specifically for parents or anyone concerned with someone struggling to initiate and/or sustain recovery.
Those we serve do everythingfrom the comfort of their own home.
Instead of just lecturing, we offer strategies that have shown to be successful in getting a loved one into treatment.
Reclaim your power so you’re more capable of handling a loved one who is having difficulties.
You’ll be stronger. You’ll feel better about yourself. Your self-esteem will go up. Your ability to handle difficult situations in a positive way is more likely to happen.
Do you currently have a recovery plan that is working? We will help you develop one that will keep people in treatment for the long term!
Fair warning, recovery will not appeal to the parent seeking a "quick fix". Recovery is hard work. However, I have observed that anyone with a genuine commitment to learn can be very successful.
Invest 1,800 today and get one year of recovery education and support for up to 4 persons! That's only $1.25 per person per day.
"Tim helped us reduce chaos and increase peace" - Brian, recovering parent
Addiction is a “system” that involves both the young adult & parents. Although one part of the system may be resistant to change (duh!), it is still possible to change the whole system through its other parts, in this case the parents.
What this means is that it's not necessary to force or coerce people into treatment or force or coerce them to do anything for that matter (there are always exceptions but the truth is people don't like to be forced into anything).
I suggest that treatment is not living up to its potential because it refuses to stop treating individuals (90% of family/social resources go to an individual) and start collaborating with families as the default approach.
Why does our approach work?
The "family intervention” approach works because it focuses on the total picture and all of the people and dynamics involved.
We do not single out the addicted loved one as “the problem” and we don't let labels and myths keep him or her from being held responsible for either fixing the problems or living with the consequences.
We work with the family members who want the situation to change, instead of obsessing on the addicted loved one and what they're doing, who a lot of the time has a vested interest in things staying the same.
It works because we focus on the people who want to change rather than trying to force change onto someone else. Whether dealing with a family, a couple, or anyone else, success always means working with whomever is motivated.
"How a family operates isn't the primary focus of treatment programs, because the child is the identified client....” Excerpt From: Krissy Pozatek. “The Parallel Process.”
Parenting is awfully frustrating and often a lonely place, especially when a child has substance use disorder and/or mental illness. I recommend to parents this is the ultimate opportunity to reassure kids that their relationship isn’t broken and most importantly reassure the child that they are, in fact, not broken.
This coaching program helps parents to realize that they are their children’s best bet, it actually challenges parents to their own maturity. It gives them the confidence that they know what’s good for their kids, and that they should stand up to them—this is, in fact, an act of love required of parents. They become, in effect, the grown-ups their children need.
What do the specialists say?
As a family issue, those who have been affected by addiction may take years to recover, as they rebuild and stabilize their lives, independent of what the alcohol and drug addicted family member does.
Without question, it can seem overwhelming, but it helps to keep in mind that commitment to the recovery process is also a commitment to the overall well being of the whole family.
Constructive and active family engagement in the recovery process is essential if the family is to heal from the destructive impact of addiction.
- NCAAD, The National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, Inc.
My child is addicted to drugs and as a result of this program:
I am getting closer to my husband as we try to solve this challenge
I am getting closer to my other son and daughter as we had a common goal to solve
My friends have been a source of inspiration and we have had incredible moments of authentic connection as a result of my child being addicted to drugs.
It broke down the barriers between my in-laws as they were able to help and I started to value their support
It helped me communicate more.
It helped me realize that every family has its challenges and that we have amazing strength in times of crisis
What does the research say?
Stephanie Brown, author and specialist in "Family Recovery" performed a great service when she referred to the impact of addiction recovery on the family system as the “trauma of recovery.”
Her work underscores two critical truths: 1) recovery can be destabilizing to families whose roles, rules and rituals have become organized around active addiction, and 2) family members and family units need sustained support through the recovery process.
Family members of loved ones in pre-hab, residential treatment, IOP, aftercare, sober living or therapy
Spouses, children and siblings of addicts
Parents of adolescents
Anyone concerned about a friend or loved one
Topics we cover?
change and motivation
accomodating reluctance to change
self-care and self rewards
address family specific strengths, needs and challenges
accessing community support
assertive referrals to specialized family services that are beyond our scope
coping with anxiety
importance of ongoing recovery management checkups as a means to improve the long-term outcomes
safety and support
coping with lapses
trust and forgiveness
discovering the power of choice
rebranding the family
creating mission statements for all family members
“One to one coaching combined with The B.A.L.M. program, is like taking years of Al-anon and putting it into 12 weeks. The B.A.L.M. has brought me to a more center of calmness and has helped me come from a place of love when dealing with my son. In addition, it has helped dealing with others I interact with in my life. My conversations with everyone have changed drastically after learning to script and remembering to Be A Loving Mirror. The live interactive calls, B.A.L.M. principles, 7 steps to B.A.L.M. and talks with my assigned recovery buddy have been such a blessing to my own recovery and also in supporting my son's recovery (not his disease). This is a very condensed version of my love of the B.A.L.M. program, trust me I could go on longer.” - Stacey, recovering parent
Sustainable Recovery ™ Caring for Your Family from Start to Flourish! Contact Timothy Harrington Email:email@example.com Telephone: 323-804-5555
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